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Restless Mouse Product Update Log The Restless Mouse Novelty Co. FAQ: Shipping, returns, coupons, and other mysteries Deep discounts on discontinued dreck
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Office (cell) (425) 343-6750
or Tollfree 1-800-948-5785

ThatRestlessMouse.com Shopper Help Page

HELP DESK Helping you buy crud on the internet
to brighten temporarily your drab existence.      

ASK THE HEAD CHEESE

Here are the main things we get asked about. If your question isn't answered here, here's how to call or contact us online.





HELP DESK - Shipping Times & Costs      

Shipping & Logistics

OR: "Delivery doesn't mean we are going to remove your liver"


We aim to just "break even" on shipping; because of our free shipping on orders of a certain size, and various other promotions, the burden of shipping tends to slide to smaller orders. HOWEVER- See our "Shipping is Golden" offer below!

Shipping Costs & Times (from zip code 98223)

We are North of Seattle, Washington, so shipments to West Coast and NW states may be quicker than to the East. It helps to be near a major airport too.

SHIPPING IS GOLDEN PROMISE

If we charge more than $1.99 over the actual postage for S&H, email us and we will send you a gift certificate code for DOUBLE the difference off your next order (Good for one year from date of request) This offer applies to all shipping methods. OFFER VOID if the original order had any coupon or discount applied.


All about PRIVACY

The staff of The Restless Mouse have all taken this PLEDGE of PRIVACY:


I will use your information only for the purposes of getting your purchase to your house. I will not "spam" you, junk-mail you, call you on the telephone, or fax you. No one will appear on your doorstep, or wipe your windshield with a dirty rag. You will not see my reflection in store windows. I will not give, sell, loan, lease, or otherwise distribute your information. I will not contact your mother and tell her what you bought, or rat you out to any other authority figure. In the event that my business is acquired, your information will NOT be part of the deal, and if deemed necessary I will roll your invoice up and smoke it. Once you receive your goods I will disavow all knowledge of your existence.


EMAIL MARKETING

WE WILL NOT SEND MESSAGES TO YOU EXCEPT FOR:

  1. The initial reciept for the order (You also get a paper copy with your goods)
  2. An email when we ship that has a crummy USPS tracking number (They don't track it all stops like United Parcel does)
    (Please note in some cases we use a computer-generated stamp so you don't always get the tracking number email)
... Of course if you did not supply an email, you won't get any email from us.

For those who are interested

There is a "subscribe" option about halfway down on the left sidebar- We send an email to that list, not more than one a week but at least once a month, that's our new goal. Usually with a coupon code in it. There are other ways to get coupon deals from us if you don't want the emails.

But I digress. We too get plenty of email telling how to get rich on Ebay (HA HA HA), potions to help make some body parts smaller and others larger, mortgages, lotto winnings on games no one ever entered, pleas for help from Zimbabwe royal family members, plus lots of strange questions from eBaY shoppers (Can you get this $2 item to my houseboat in the south of France by 4pm your time? I don't want to pay extra for shipping though.) Etc. Etc.... Bottom line, The Restless Mouse Co. respects your privacy.


CREDIT CARD PRIVACY - Our online system hides the card number from us on successful transactions. So your card number isn't "out there". Phone orders and such, I keep your card number in a hidden paper file until the return policy window expires. Then we shred it.